Sunday 29 June 2008

It's hard to say good bye...

Today was my next to last day in New York. I was really stressed out with all the packing, shipping and selling furniture to vacate my apartment. Then I got this CD as a surprise goodbye gift. I came home, opened it on my computer and saw this presentation with a note saying "Since I didn't get a achance to meet your Mr Right, perhaps one day when you find him, you can share this with him so he can make you happy". It definitely made my day, just knowing that someone out there cares about me in his own way...



Understanding Mai:



  • Don’t throw farewell parties for her, otherwise she doesn’t like it
  • If you call/email/text her and she doesn’t respond within a day, just be patient
  • She likes to laugh (A LOT), make her laugh, and make sure to laugh at her jokes
  • Listen to her when she speaks, she has a lot of interesting things to say
  • She likes to write, encourage her
  • Be prepared to drink (and I don’t mean water!)
  • She likes to read, offer to take her to book signing events
  • Don’t be intimidated if most of her friends are guys
  • When she is sad, offer to take her for some ice cream, ice cream will cheer her up

  • Be prepared to play the "questions game" when hanging out with her
  • Don’t order the same food as her, otherwise she doesn’t like it
  • She is adventurous and demanding, expect the world from her
  • She likes architecture, offer to take her to see unique architecture places
  • She might say something mean to you from time to time, don’t take it personal, she might not mean it.

  • Remind her to wear headphones when she walks outside (so that guys won't approach her)

  • She likes to walk rather than drive, suburban life is not for her.




Disclaimer: My blog is for entertainment purposes only, please do not take it seriously or personally. Thank you!

Monday 9 June 2008

A diversified portfolio

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This is a continuation of my other post Who would you choose?

Ladies and gentlemen,

I am please to announce the addition of Mr. G (a.k.a. “The bad boy”). This should complete and diversify the “love” investment portfolio. Since there’s no such stock called “Mr. Right” or “Prince Charming” to buy, we might as well invest in a range of stocks of “Mr. Alright”, “Mr. Right here”, "Mr. Right now" or “Mr. Almost charming”. A diversified portfolio is every girl’s best friend. It protects her from any swings in the market but still gives her a good rate of return.

This is a sales pitch for Mr. G:

Mr. G (not G-string though)

In his late, very late twenties. High school dropout. No stable job, doesn’t care too much about money but never goes out without it. Parties all the time, smokes, drinks, and flirts a lot. Obsessive with soccer and cars; always has girls to hang out with and makes them feel very very comfortable around him. Gives girls the assurance and safe feeling when around him. Makes them enjoy their current moment and not have to worry about what’s gonna happen next.

The stock of Mr. G can be classified as a speculative stock (a stock that is highly likely to have very low or negative returns because it is almost always overpriced. These stocks have a low probability of a return near that of the market but a slight probability of an enormous return). Please proceed with caution when considering this stock. There is significant risks involved (as we all know, high risk, high return). While the prospect of an enormous return might sound attractive, it is not guaranteed. You also might get some immediate dividends (he makes you laugh and makes your heart skip a few beats) but the dividends payout is also not sustainable (here today, disappear tomorrow). And don’t be surprise if one day all your stocks value suddenly dropped to $0 (and leaves you with a broken heart). So go ahead and buy a few shares for the fun and the thrill of taking risks. But just don’t invest all your money in this stock.

If there is one thing everybody should learn about investing is to have a diversified portfolio. Or as our parents always taught us “Do not put all your eggs in one basket”. Girls are complicated and need different things at different times. Therefore we need to invest in different types of “love” stocks. A smart guy to help you with your homework, a successful guy to help you with your career, a funny guy to make you laugh, a caring guy to lend you his shoulder to cry on, a hot guy to flirt with, a bad guy to share your adventures with, and a guy in a different time zone to call in the middle of the night when all the other guys are sleeping.

But it also depends on your investment return objectives. Some girls invest for the long term, some for the short term, some wants current income but others want capital appreciation. Some are more risk adverse than others. So depending on your objective and strategy, choose your asset allocation wisely. If you want current income, invest in each stock equally. But if you are in it for the long term and want capital appreciation, choose the stock you like best and invest 90%, spread the remaining 10% evenly between the other stocks. And don’t forget to leave some money in your savings account. Although the interest is pretty low, you will still have some money left for “old age” in case of a stock market crash like that of 1929 or 1987 .

Disclaimer 1: My investment advice is free and is only worth what you pay for. I am not responsible for the outcome of your investments whatsoever. Please also keep in mind that there are additional costs in having such a portfolio such as the time answering calls, IM and text messaging from all different guys. Please be warned that no investment strategy, no matter how superior, can protect you from getting hurt.

Disclaimer 2: My blog is for entertainment purposes only, please do not take it seriously or personally. Thank you!